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OMEGA | Obe Alkema
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Obe Alkema

02 Sep Obe Alkema

CORSET LIFE

 

————“Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has them.”
————–Khloé Kardashian

This is a developing story…
This is the only expectation I can live up to.

Disclaimer: the amount of Kim Kardashian in this poem
might seem disproportional, but who are you fooling?
Spoiler alert: yourself.

She is a main character in my life hence in my poetry.
I cannot be critical of her.

Are you in a hurry?

————“I’m not opaque. I’m so relevant I’m disappearing.”
————–Anaïs Duplan

Withdrawing from the market was never an option.
I have been forced into it like Kim Kardashian West was forced into a corset
for the shoot of Fergie’s long-awaited, highly problematic
but nonetheless generous comeback. Forcing Kim Kardashian West into this poem
was never an option. It is used to welcome her. We both enjoy this corset life. Now
I’m unemployed but the market will make me very happy
if I keep investing in it.

I prefer not to show you examples
because I am sure you can come up
with something more original if
I don’t place a visual in your brain.

I am not in a hurry.

————“You will never be mentally sober.”
————–Frank O’Hara

One of my friends is out there on Reddit waiting to be cummed on.
She collects cum tributes.
Her bf delivered. Jizz skills on point.
She could make a living out of it,
but too many men are just lurking around. Talk less,
cum more.

Like Kanye I’m also so glad his wife has Snapchat.
We should stop referring to Kim Kardashian as “his wife”.

Maybe I’m in a hurry.
Maybe I don’t want to talk about class.
Maybe I wanna talk about my class.

I am a dysfunctional Millennial, but aren’t we all?

An obvious highlight of my life is Kim Kardashian’s selfie
posted on the 24th of April 2016.
Instagram likes 601K (and counting)
#lifegoals

I’m not a regular Millennial, I’m a cool Millennial.
Instead of imagining my emotions in metaphors I declare
that I have emotions. I state that I have feelings. Not regular feelings,
cool feelings. Declaring having feelings makes me feel comfortable,
because I don’t have to feel anything at all.

When you can’t do life because you get distracted by everything.
When you can’t do life because you get distracted by Kardashian memes.
I capture feelings in Kardashian memes.
They talk to me on an affective level.
Unlike regular Millennials I’m not just referring to the Kardashians. Unlike them
I’m not just being ironic.
I’m being dramatic.
I’m being sincere.
I’m being a dramatic and sincere Millennial. And a cool one.

Current mood: slut shame or slut fame?

Our bodies were under water but there were people
everywhere around us. This line originally was pornographic
but now it’s reterritorialized on this semen white page
as part of a narrative fantasy. This narrative fantasy
is no fantasy at all, but a record
of my breakdown. I don’t do fantasy, I do real.

May I get as much praise and attention on this day
as an average Millennial feels entitled to every day.

Now that’s a lot of information to swallow.

————“G I Z to the I B E I’m a bad girl, can’t you see?”
————–CL, 나쁜 기집애(THE BADDEST FEMALE)

As he evolved in space, time and sexuality,
his poetry did as well. Obe Alkema’s poetry is queer aware,
but only when it’s related to Obe Alkema.
Narcissism is my Marxism.

I am going through a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now. Edit:
I am going through a pre-Kimye beef Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.

Some cackle, I cockle.

The internet taught me that you don’t need an education to marry rich
and yet here I am with my education and without a ring on it.
This never happens to the Kardashians.

————“I’m sitting with MYSELF”
————–Ted Berrigan

It is very often the case that I’m sitting with myself,
celebrating myself while sipping champagne.

I am a common whore, but my anaconda don’t –

Hurry up, we’re investing. Even though
I flirt with pop culture, I really am flirting with the money
behind it. The money behind the Kardashians. If there’s no money involved,
I’m not interested.
Go with the ca$$$h flow.
I only remain loyal and invested if Capital
is standing behind me
and drops a coin #BowDown

#throwback: resurfacing videos of my 2012 self
that locked itself up for the common good and that was unaware
of its queer potential
of its potential to be sloppy
of its potential to drunkfuck a boy on a carpet. Obe Alkema is interrupted
by the memory of a nameless boy he fucked
on a carpet. He writes about him not because of potential $$$. He writes about him
because he cares. He cares about people
who are inaccessible.

The first thing he said was: are you in a hurry?
This was an exchange that happened so naturally that the market
can be proud of us.

————“Who DOESN’T think of Kim K?”
————–Mia You

The overdose of Kim Kardashian in this poem is due
to the leftist elite’s lack of knowledge of the Kardashiana. I am the herald
of the Kardashiana. I speak of what they already know, but do not wish to admit.
You can’t get past the Kardashians. You can only keep up with them.
They’re the avant-garde.

No more pressure.
No more black bars to cover Kim Kardashian’s breasts.
No more pressure.
No more sad boyz realities.
No more unswallowing.
No more shame only fame.
No more lurking around.
No more pressure.
No more pressure for Ke$ha.
No more pressure
#NoPressure

 


 

Obe Alkema lives in the Netherlands. He publishes in various Dutch and Flemish magazines. He is part of the exhibition “Institutional Garbage“, on view on the website of the Chicago-based gallery Sector 2337.

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