MAY ❋ Sarah Jean Alexander

I understand being overworked beyond repair
and under­utilized until you start to truly believe
that you were put on this earth just to do nothing until it is over

In the warmest month yet my pussy presses against the subway seat
at least once a day in a short dress that looks nice on the outside
and hasn’t been washed since last year and I miss that part of the season most

We walked into the bedroom and you took everything
from my hands so that I could climb into bed first
and then you followed closely behind me

I close my eyes immediately and think about
how I grew myself up to smile easily and love when I want to
and shout louder than anyone else in the room
have you heard me

I grew myself up to hold hands with whatever is closest
I grew myself up to vomit when I have a headache and to relax when I am sad
I’m an aggressive optimist and it’s okay if I want to die one day soon