Goldie Negelev

ALLUVIUM

We kill time in America
daddy’s got an inflatable tube
he laughs, watches me decay in salt water
my face gets ravaged by the beautiful sea
but I like myself
better now, then light another cigarette
every day is different here and I am addicted to the sensation of living
I walk the way people do when they want to fuck
for fun I show my nipples to a few tourists
an older woman scolds me
her husband stares
whispers, flash me again, girl
I spend a whole lifetime with my face full of cake
and a belly full of monsters
here in America where the weather is fine
and I am a little bit lonely.

AFTER

this cage is so public I discover the cow’s true feelings

for example, he gets excited by thoughts of turning around

sunlight bores him the cow has no desire to go out into the world

the cow smiles waiting to die

inside metal inside unfolding quilt of green.

at my desk I am fascinated & depressed by asphalt plastic cups

optimism what my feelings were I cannot remember how I got so suddenly un-alone

this fucking rattleonly one moment left & every surface is full of noise

I avoid the internet each screen a ghost in my room

to find the flower opening, slowlyI mourn & manage to go nowhere

Goldie Negelev is a poet living in Oakland, California. Her poetry has appeared in various online journals.

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